The new launcher is out of Beta. I haven't installed it yet. The long list of changes and updates makes me happy. I'm not one to opt in early to new tech. I like my access to my hobbies to work and not give me amazing surprises.
The new camera is also in beta. So far, I've heard mostly horror. It is not that the features the new camera give are bad. It is that the new camera does not have a 'classic' camera. Opinions?
With Christmas in the air, some rebalancing was done to the project Frostline sites. Get them while you can. It won't be forever. I had wondered if Project Frostline would be all of Christmas. I refused to dig any deeper. Christmas presents are not a CSM thing in my opinion. I have also found myself rather upset with people the last few years as they complain about the free extra stuff CCP gives out. Per the dev blog, this year it will be snowballs and fireworks, some clothing and trinkets that have no value but for memories. I'm fine with this but I expect to see very angry people at not getting something in particular. Signal Cartel should be quite happy and Mynxee's snowball orders filled for another year.
With Christmas in the air there is no Eve store in time to sit under the tree. CCP Spitfire released an update. We've been poking about the Eve store for a bit and I am glad to see the update. It is disappointing that it is not here now. I've put some time into this one, as have some other members. I hope to proudly display my Eve keychain soon and I'm hopefully that some of our discussion and feedback will come to fruition for something that makes me want to empty my wallet. I am a t-shirt wearing, mug loving, key chain wanting, gamer geek having stuff.
(A quick snapshot over my desk as I write this. Yes, I know they are not even. I didn't want them to be.)
Another change to trials. This one I found interesting. There is no the trial for 14 days. The buddy invite for 21 days. Or the starter pack with an extended trial for 20 extra days. We've discusesed the trials a few times and the starter packs. Starter packs had a problem of not having an actual value. A skinned ship is a skinned ship. Under the old system it made a new player a target. Under the new, its just a skin. It doesn't do much for them. The trial extension is a new venture. We will see how it goes.
And now to address a handful of other stuff.
I was asked to sum up the CSM in one word on twitter. Normally, I avoid those types of questions. I told people during the election cycle that I'd not answer, 'yes' and 'no' questions after they loaded them. But, some words are broad and encompassing. The CSM is exhausting to me. Exhaustion however is not a bad thing. It is exhausting to succeed and to fail to fight and to win. The CSM is about energy. It absorbs it.
I was also asked to answer some questions on reddit. I was mildly amused that several people stepped up to politely tell the poster that I'd probably not answer. I've always turned down the AMA (ask me anything) posts people have suggested I do. I am not a regular to reddit and walking on expecting people to want to hear what I say when we've never talked before seems a bit arrogant. I'm happy to speak when invited to do so, and I did.
"Oh, Sugar. Please don't make me read reddit!"
I understand. To my surprise, the thread did not go poorly. And yes, I was expecting it to. With each response I decided to be honest, open, and complete and take the fall out for it. I think I bored people. My earnest and sincere responses creep some people out. It boils down to: Yes the CSM has value, no I don't think its dead, no I don't think it should be headshot, I hope that I can leave something productive behind me, but shit is broke, yo.
I've seen the strangest thing. People have suggested that I don't waste my time fighting or that if I am upset I should resign and go away. That puzzles me. Am not I here to fight for these things? Am not I here to use this time to try to bring change and tackle topics? When I sit down and write and write honestly, I'm not in a rage like spiral. I'm not particularly mad. I'm frustrated that we are still struggling with the same communication problems. I'm disappointed in the behavior I have seen around me. What I have learned is that my issues with CCP are not what drain me and wear me down. To some extent, I've always expected them. It is the ugly, negative vibe that resonates across the player base that saps me. I've been told I'm supposed to just ignore that as well.
"Sugar, you seemed burned out," I was told. In another thread someone basically says I seem not as engaged or enthusiastic. The answer is that I am very tired. There are a lot of things that I have given up that I miss. I miss them because I miss playing the game. That is also my fault in how I approached things. Each day I am often met with a choice of what to do with my time and there is always stuff to do on the CSM side. I do that because my time in office is finite.
I've been chastised for honesty before. It is one of the many things that has happened over the last two years that puzzles me. During the elections for CSMX, one of the review shows said that they don't want to see behind the scenes. They want results. The analogy was sausage. That particular topics hit me pretty hard because I've been functioning on an open book policy. I try to lay things out as they are. Yet, maybe that too was wrong. I do believe that by telling people the bad stuff, the failures, and the things that are a struggle or painful, I've made myself appear weak and incapable to some. I know that you are not supposed to share that stuff but its the other side of the good.
Perhaps I am burned out. Maybe burned out doesn't mean what I think it means. Because I am not bouncing around cheer-leading? Because I am not smiling and pretending that things are fine when there are problems? Is it the honesty? Is it not enough honesty? I ask myself a lot of questions these days and often walk away saying, I don't know. I don't know if that means I'm dried up and about to be blown away with the wind. I feel pretty solid. I always viewed burn out as dropping and walking away. Maybe that was my fault for sharing the loss of my dog and how badly it has shaken my every day. Maybe I should have been lying all of this time about what an endlessly badass baller I am about everything.
Burned out or not, y'all are still stuck with me for another three or four months! I have a bit more to do and stuff to finish up. And a summit in February. If it helps, I'm gonna take my mom to see Star Wars on Christmas day since I managed to get it off of work. And I get to go visit my soon to be new puppy in two weeks.