Monday, May 4, 2015

The Next Stop

I came home and Tikktokk beat me about the head with mathematical equations. It was an interesting entry to the game considering my thoughts earlier today. I've never been ashamed of admitting that I am bad at Eve. I'm not technical. I'm not an engineer. I don't see the game in its numeric forms. I do things by feel, and sense, and touch. I fly the ships that feel right to me in the fits that feel right. I could not tell you why I like one more than other. The closest I have come is that they best support my reactions and interpretation of the game.

There are things that I can do in Eve but I could not explain or teach. Sometimes, I wonder if I am behind for the length of time that I have played. Seeing that Chella had ticked over 70 million skill points has left me wondering. I still find that I expect to feel something with each skill point level. Seventy million was an unheard of number at one time. It was not something that I'd ever achieve.

If it is even achieved.

Skills train in real time. I simply have to plug them in. I still have to learn how to use them and with my low activity levels this last year I am going to have to learn to use a lot of things. In my mind I am still a Jaguar pilot just kissing forty million skill points and able to reasonably fly two races of frigates and cruisers with a kissing of T2 sprinkled in.

It may be why I am so comfortable starting an alt. I don't know what to do with my mains. For years now, I've been training towards other peoples doctrines. I've been training to be the best fleet pilot that I could be. I've made money to afford whatever fit I was told to fly without flinching. I've trained so that I never had to question anything about it.

But, that's not the same as having personal goals and wants.

I was happy two years ago as a tackle pilot buzzing around in my assault frigate. Some of it was stubbornness. I know my ship of choice is not good or the best but I enjoyed it. The more people told me that my ship of choice sucked the more determined I was to fly how I wanted to. But I tempered that habit of mine of biting on and not letting go of something with reasonableness by learning things that would allow me to be useful.

Now, I'm a bit lost. I can do so many things but I don't know what I want to do with them. I can do things that I've never done so I don't even know if I like them.

Having seventy million skill points hasn't bestowed any knowledge. No magical door has opened to show me the way. It's still just me under here. Trying to figure things out.

12 comments:

  1. I quit when I had like 74 or 75 million SP. Back then, I wa susing, maybe, 20 million of those SP. Many where from dead ends: fancied flying e-war, trained it, when I had enough skils at Level 4 I no longer wanted to try PvP, nor e-war. Trained for stealth bombers, a bit for exploration, invested a SP refund into PI... most of the time, whenever the skills were trained, I already had moved to another goal.

    Setting EVEmon plans worked the same: would set a plan and usually would shift for another plan when it was partially completed. Always had a tough time doing the same "new plan" for more than a few weeks.

    Plans promised "new ways to play", but that could only overcome the same old boring game for a while, before becoming "we aren't there yet? Can't even try whether I like it or don't? Let's see that other new thingie..."

    Eventually, i had enough. 70 or 75 million SP, and was doing the same as a few months after starting. No new content, and nothing in the future worth having all those SP. Never trained a single SP for Capitals. Never trained a single SP for blasters/railguns. Never used millions and millions of SP I earned while chasing the idea of doing something "new", but the game was just the same old boring thing. it sitll is now.

    And yet... I resent not being able to use those SP. They costed me money, and time, and specially... how would I say...? Hope. Or maybe Faith. Or maybe just wishful thinking and self-delusion.

    In a way, I feel cheated after earning all those SP for nothing. That's a feeling which tastes bitter...

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    Replies
    1. Onions, if I may ask, when did you stop playing Eve? If you'll indulge me further, when did you stop paying for a subscription (as it's possible to not play and still subscribe)?

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    2. Odyssey was the last expansion I tried, so that was like two years ago.

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    3. Onions,

      As point of comparison I looked up the born on date of the 70 million skill point character 'Chella' Sugar refers to - December, 2011. Accordingly, Chella represents roughly 2 years & 5 months of training time. As you explain, your main, whomever that was, had some 75 million skill points before you quit so let’s figure that represents 2 years and 6 months of training time. Odyssey was released in June of 2013 or 1 year and 11 months ago. This puts you a mere 7 months short of complaining about Eve for longer than you appear to have actually played the game. I hope you make it past that December 2015 whining milestone Onions, I truly do. Everybody needs goals.

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    4. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxVb5mlN-W0

      He is not whining... he is complaining... solve his problems with Eve and he'd probably be right back here flying around with us...

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    5. @DireNecessity, yoru estimates are off mark. I started playing in 2007 and played on and off until somewhere between Odyssey and Rubicon. My highest skill char was born in 2008 and I was unsubbed for maybe 9 or 10 months in different stretches before taking a final leave. So probably I played with that char for the best part of 4 years, plus the time I spent with one skilled alt (some 20 million SP iirc) and two starter alts, and my abandoned first char.

      Now, IIRC, 2400 SP/hour is a high ratio, and those would be around 21 million SP per year if you trained every skill at that high rate. Which is unlikely because different skills need different attributes and what maxes out one skill cuts down the speed of another one.

      As for talking about EVE, why oh why should I stop doing it for as long as I care about the game? Sooner or later CCP will either give love to PvE or lose that demographic to other games and CCP's own blindness.

      And meanhwile, it doesn't even costs me money to spread my alternate view point... which may be wrong and may stink 90% of the time, but I hope it can provide some useful insight on the "dark side" of EVE each now and then.

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  2. I suppose you solicit suggestions from the peanut gallery about a career path. I do believe some can be very passionate about their heavens or hells.

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  3. I love the new gameplay that opens up as my characters unlock various skills. It allows me to diversify my play time and do anything in the EVE universe including solo PVP, small gang PVP, Fleet PVP, Exploration, Industry, Mining, Trading, Hauling, combat probing, cloaky stalking, scouting....You get the idea.

    - Than

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    Replies
    1. Maybe I cheated a bit with my alts.

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    2. I have alts, including a purchased toon. I still love the ability to do a wide variety of activities. Sometimes I feel like I'm being pulled apart in a hundred directions when things get busy, but I can always log different toons in if I want to do something different. The biggest thing for me now is to just try not to get tied into massive projects that requirely daily/weekly upkeep so I can just pick and choose what I want to do on any give day.

      - Than

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  4. Man, every day I look at my skill queue, always at least a year long, and despair.

    Somehow I find new skills I want to learn every day, a process which will probably last until I have everything except cap skills. (I hate capitals with a passion.)

    But I see no reason to stop playing after running everything full, it will probably be a lot less stressful even! Of course different people have different temperaments, so I can understand someone using skill points as some kind of measurement.

    I just can't see it this way, for me skill points are more like a barrier I slowly erode every day.

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  5. I really think alts "kill the enjoyment of the game", im up to 60m SP, and i still want more, have at least 6 ships i want to fly that i cant yet...
    for when im feeling lost supports as done the trick for me... that last 5% falloff i can feel proud of xd

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