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Watching Helping

Some days, niceness is a soothing balm. I've flown more in the last few days then I have in months. My local window is firmly minimized and I've decided that the 'clear content' option would be perfect if I didn't have to have the chat window open to access it. Watching someone get help without any belittlement was nice. There was no, "What is that fit?" comments. No one told them that they where wrong and that they should fly something else that they did not want to fly. Instead, the time was taken to figure out how to get that person into a better position.

Said person was a player coming back after being gone from the game for two years. His Armageddon was no longer the ship he had once flown. He did not have the skills for what was now a drone boat. He was not a PvPer interested in its abilities as a baby Bhaalgorn. Nor did he have much in the way of ISK to buy another ship. He was trying to solve his own problem with what he had.

I very much enjoyed listening to the conversation. It was in Seamus' game mechanics class after the official class was finished. Eve has so many bits and bobs to learn. I wound up in low sec with people way above my skill and understanding so early that I missed parts of what I consider a normal players education. I learn vicariously. I live vicariously in some ways the type of play style that I have not yet experienced. Some may look down upon the high sec mission runner but I do not. They make more ISK then I do on average and they certainly tend to lose less ISK then I do.

So I listened to this guy try to solve his problems. There was no whining. He was not complaining. He was a bit frustrated about his ship but his solution was to try to work around it. He was out there trying and seeking help to do better and learn how he might improve. He was supported in finding his path.

Some people thrive in environments with negativity as a motivator. One of the people who trained me for my current job believed that people only learned from mistakes. He'd let you fall, yell at you, and then tell you the correct thing. I never learned well that way and the two of us did not function well together. In Eve, I've never learned from the lose ships until you figure out what is going on method.

I appreciate those who have taken the time to help me learn this game. Without them, I'd still be in my any gun I happened to have in my hangar, Catalyst. I dislike belittlement and I've always gone out of my way to avoid it in Eve. I've probably not been as adventitious as I want to be. Sometimes the weight of negativity is an enormous obstacle for someone to overcome. Eve is a game with so many technical right ways that the artistic soul can sometimes be lost.

I also have terrible taste in things. Jaguars, Revelations, Thanatos, Ares... I never do manage to pick or fly what is supposed to be good. The eye rolling and smirks are irritating. But then, I'm a noncompetitive person in a competitive environment.

It was nice seeing someone's questions answered for what they where. I flipped through a little mental question list. Should I offer help? With one donation his ISK problems would be solved. But I did not get the impression that was what was needed. He wasn't asking for ISK. He was asking how to correct his situation on his own and getting the support he needed to do so within his current capabilities.


  1. I feel ya... In a similar vein, a memory surfaced tonight... We were on comms with a new bro and he asked about how players interacted... or some such, and it brought up a time when we, HBHI & HELPeR together ran into some guys on a raid on a connecting hole... We fought, they were new and really new to holes... we kinda owned em a bit... Then, afterwards... Sov convoed the CEO and they talked, he offered to help them understand the what/where/how & why of the fight... later, we ended up doing a raid with them later...

    It's one of the reasons, many reasons, I really like the guys I fly with... we don't smack, we don't talk down to newer players, we believe in the GF and in giving a new bro a hand up. I sincerely believe there are far far moar of us in New Eden than there are of the griefers and hardass uber players... I think they're just louder than the rest of us is all, and I could not care less about em. =]

  2. Nice thought and well said :)

    It always struck me as odd that, in this environment where pretty much everyone wants more ppl to fly with or call on in times of crisis, ppl are so quick to sneer. Unless I am at war, whenever I explode I always convo the person afterward for a chat and learn even more than I just did.

    But TBH even in Jita local if someone asks a question out of inexperience, someone is nice about it and helps. And helping ppl is IMO the best way to recruit to your corp.

    1. When I want to lay blame, I lay it on the feet of Eve's highly competitive aspects with no clear win conditions.

      Lots of people are nice one on one. Public appearances and social pressures can bring out what I consider to be an unfortunate side of some.


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