There is something about being helpless that kicks another part of your survival instincts into gear. Life is different in a defenseless ship and I found myself scowling when I realized I could not log off due to my freighter being targeted. The Machariel bumped me and irritated, I started scanning space for an answer to my problem.
Why, oh why, had I jumped out of my ascendancy set? Oh yes, someone was shooting my jump freighter and I needed to go get my Rorqual. Right. Damn it.
However, I think my bumpers were just bumping to bump and maybe take time to get a really good cargo scan. I had three T2 bulkheads and 800 million in cargo. There are better ganks out there. I stopped worrying when I noticed I had aligned to war. The Machariel was busy bumping more than one freighter and I was at the keyboard even if autopiloting.
What were my options beyond not autopiloting? Working with only defense is a challenge. I was scarmbling a webbing alt when I warped. I like to think that I was cleaver and made it out but in reality I do not think that I was worth ganking. And that was my real defense. Not being worth it. Preplanning. Making judgement calls that may or may not have been good.
Eve is a weird game at times. It is a game of survival more often than not. Sure, we fight for fun but removed from an arena or defined challenge situation we make decisions good or bad. My freightering is not about the class sense of PvP. Yet, my pulse was thumping. All of my planning would or would not pay off. My decision making was limited and it might or might not work out. I had set myself up to survive and now it was being tested.
And I lived.
It is a little story. One freighter of the thousands that track across the space lanes. One more escape. Today was not my day to lose my freighter. Yet.
It is the little stories that make up Eve for me. Other's may find different callings. But for me, the day to day life of my fellow pilots fascinates. The wins and loses the accomplishments and failures. Good and bad the heartbeat of Eve is not the big, flashy Events. It's the Ventures that escape and newbies that first undock in the depths of the nebula. It is when someone runs to me to tell me they finally achieved something they've been trying for or that moment when I can help someone that's helped me so many times before.