tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2383245795047902024-03-15T21:10:10.444-04:00Low Sec Lifestyle<p>This is the world of serious internet spaceship business.</p>Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.comBlogger1766125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-90121502805064890112020-08-06T21:02:00.003-04:002020-08-06T21:02:55.173-04:00And back againMy very slow wormhole adventure continues almost as slowly as I am terminating my island in Animal Crossing. <div><br /></div><div>My class 3 wormhole was not where I wanted to be. I was looking for a class 1 or 2 wormhole. I dropped my probes and with much less confusion scanned another wormhole. I remembered to dscan and collect my probes as I warped to the wormhole. I even remembered to drop a bookmark, wormholes being such good bookmark locations later.</div><div><br /></div><div>My wormhole told me it was a route into low sec. I tilted my head. How circular do our adventures go. Today might be the day to die and that too is okay. That mantra dances in the back of my head these days. Even if someone mocks me, what does that matter? Fattening someone's killboard is their issue not mine.</div><div><br /></div><div>So I jumped through and found myself in Efa in Khanid, tucked on the edge of high sec and null sec. What an interesting little system. Several connections to high sec. A connection to null sec. This must be quite the traffic system. <span> </span></div><div><span><br /></span></div><div><span>I am find that it is easy to tap into the old paranoia. I keep forgetting to set bookmarks on the other side of the wormhole because I bolt from the hole so quickly. In my mind someone was hunting me. In actuality, no one was looking for me.</span></div><div><span><br /></span></div><div><span>Back in regular space I took the time to redeem and dump the trash that we seem to get every day now. Do boosters still piss off high sec NPCs? Have they been improved? Is their inclusion in the daily item a sign? Is it just to kill skill points?</span></div><div><span><br /></span></div><div><span>Oh well. I'm left a bit more comfortable to try to venture out again.</span></div><div><span><br /></span></div><div><span>In the background I reconnected with my original gang. I did miss those guys so that has been interesting. One asked me to take Jaguar's out again. Heh.</span></div><div><span><br /></span></div><div><span>We shall see.</span></div>Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-65243667935875668302020-08-02T02:12:00.000-04:002020-08-02T02:12:02.826-04:00Mirror, mirror on the wormhole...It is late and I've been adulating all weekend. I decided to log on and see what I can see about my wormhole adventure.<div><br /></div><div>My UI scaling complaint is still in force. Not being able to lock it to a larger size is annoying. <br /><div><br /></div><div>The first thing is that I am still alive. This is not much of an accomplishment but one should brag about the little things.</div><div><br /></div><div>Since there is little (if anything) unknown in Eve, I did the simple thing and talked to Google about the system that I was in. The web search and player made site is still an essential companion to the game. I feel bad for purists. </div><div><br /></div><div>The new wormhole is black with a red sun and gray clouds in the distance. It is a class three and I found it for sale on some planet trading website. They sell you the planet and transfer the customs offices over. It reminds me of my complete failure at doing the PI game in the past. I can sit and crochet for hours but I lose interest in fidgeting with many of Eve's popular time sinks. </div><div><br /></div><div>According to the forum post this wormhole is perfect for PI. That meant to me I might be able to find a nice plasma planet to visit. </div><div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwSVMe4TLv2OQAiawYgf6CCKdULIM3IEPETjowHGrRa5IakGzGvx601v4ksRdP86iW-m1Mj6p96aXHLQdeTRM4yike0kMSM79X8kHqNS_n91z2U4y0x4wy4hFCTWAgNv28oT_ZpmplAg/s2048/2020.08.02.05.29.18.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1162" data-original-width="2048" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwSVMe4TLv2OQAiawYgf6CCKdULIM3IEPETjowHGrRa5IakGzGvx601v4ksRdP86iW-m1Mj6p96aXHLQdeTRM4yike0kMSM79X8kHqNS_n91z2U4y0x4wy4hFCTWAgNv28oT_ZpmplAg/s640/2020.08.02.05.29.18.png" width="640" /></a></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Plasma planets are one of those overlooked wonders in Eve. They are the source of super goodies so they are somewhat scarcer compared to the endless dust ball barren planets. They are just so damn beautiful. I admit, as a blue lover I am heavily, heavily biased. </div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">But this is not the wormhole I am looking for. I am hoping to go down a size. However, my computer rebooted itself as it has started to do randomly at night and I didn't want to log in again tonight. Maybe... tomorrow. </div>Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-28937050508199655872020-07-30T23:26:00.000-04:002020-07-30T23:26:01.654-04:00The leapIt is too bad for me that so many other players have explored Eve so well. Their beautiful write ups and in depth exploration of various systems makes me make little grumpy noises as I slowly navigate through Caldari high sec. This is just not a place I ever spent much of my time. <div><br /></div><div>I'm remembering a bit about how to scan and found my first wormhole. I was never the best scanner. I never got into combat scanning. I could do it. I speced for it. But, I never did it and eventually the pressure of not being fast enough or not being good enough made me avoid doing it. There was always someone better and faster out there. </div><div><br /></div><div>But today, I have found a wormhole and this may be the day that I die.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisUTZNWiWCJ5K3kzSOuE2uSONhxmgYDl9DbHbW3T0_9W8Q0Z8Zse0aqmD3gS0Q4CZTYMU5nvYGt-hdJrFD4km4Ohc3oUXWxtNpu7K-c11Mt_j6rqnaU1eeNdo2Yg4jF1hCVlxp6Od7mw/s592/2020.07.31.03.19.37-1.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="482" data-original-width="592" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisUTZNWiWCJ5K3kzSOuE2uSONhxmgYDl9DbHbW3T0_9W8Q0Z8Zse0aqmD3gS0Q4CZTYMU5nvYGt-hdJrFD4km4Ohc3oUXWxtNpu7K-c11Mt_j6rqnaU1eeNdo2Yg4jF1hCVlxp6Od7mw/s320/2020.07.31.03.19.37-1.png" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">But like Elsa, sometimes one must go into the unknown.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-14751238228802005722020-07-29T23:27:00.001-04:002020-07-29T23:27:08.657-04:00With a scan, scan here... and a scan scan there...Look at what a good girl I am today! I remembered to save my Astero's fit so when I lose it I don't have to remember how to find my killmail for my fit. That led me to see that all of my fits were gone. I am kind of sad. Sure, most of them no longer work. They adulterated my Jaguar, but they were mind and I feel oddly possessively annoyed.<br />
<br />
A pit stop back at a station to dump my daily redemption stuff (I'm sure that this made people super mad whenever it happened,) and I was off to find a series of systems to scan for wormholes in.<br />
<br />
I remember some of the basics. The lower the sec the higher quality/value the thingies I will find. Since I wanted to find tiny wormholes, I then promptly disconnected as I was docking because my computer rebooted. I wondered if I would come back in a pod but in fact, I did not.<br />
<br />
The last task I should do as I seek a system is move my home station. It is still down in low sec areas I no longer have interest in. Then I was like, can't I do that in Jita somewhere? The answer was yes. I went to reset my clone and that opened up a little cascade of memories.<br />
<br />
Sugar's original school headquarters is Hulm. I didn't even remember. I created her and sent her down to Chella who was slogging away with the newbie corp I had joined down in Derelik back before the CEO ran off with the profits to buy a Navy Raven.<br />
<br />
My clone set and a cluster of systems selected, I ventured into the unknown.<br />
<br />
My ship seems to be more orange and purple.<br />
<br />
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<br />
(Record scratch. Several days IRL pass...)<div><br /></div><div>I do enjoy not prioritizing my time playing Eve. I feel more in control of the process. I worked and played The Division 2 and groomed my dogs instead of playing Eve during my last set of days off. Today, I decided to give it a try.</div><div><br /></div><div>With some repetition I stared at my keyboard and realized I had no idea what to do. I started pressing key combinations and I discovered that beams shoot out of your ships nose and butt when you hit dscan buttons now. Visual reminders instead of hoping for the best, that is cute.</div><div><br /></div><div>I hit my probe launchers button and realize I had no idea what to do. After a few, cautious key presses as if I had never touched a keyboard before, I remembered that stuff around my HUD is not just for how fast I am going to die. I have still forgotten all of my keyboard shortcuts. </div><div><br /></div><div>However, after a little bit I started remembering bits and pieces of how to scan. When I say bits and pieces, I mean bits and pieces. Once I found my probe screen I remembered how to move them. Then it took me a bit to figure out how to scan. With nothing found in the next system I remembered how to change their range.</div><div><br /></div><div>Two systems found. No anoms discovered and I am giving the dogs their bedtime potty break and off to bed to work another day.</div><div><br /></div>Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-52433044293093182632020-07-26T23:14:00.003-04:002020-07-26T23:14:58.253-04:00All dressed up and ready to scan"I noticed your killboard isn't active. Have you been gone for a bit?"<br />
<br />
Lol. Chats are funny. It is nice to see that my boys think so highly of my still. Poor things.<br />
<br />
I undocked and the Amarr station pooped me out like the slippery, golden turd nugget that my pod is and I started my journey. (<i>When did they add this extra glitter and graphics to the gates?). </i>I even saw one of the ship transport things sliding out of warp at the gate.<br />
<br />
I tried to do the right thing. I jumped into this clone but the only shuttle along my path was nine jumps away. Annoyed, I decided to go naked into the world. I remember that flying in your pod is bad. I just somewhat forgot why. I know implants are one reason. People sit on gates to pop pods hoping for a big kill. I'm not worried about smartbombers. So.... I ran back to my ship with my butt hanging out and my UI too small.<br />
<br />
I don't recognize any system names but I never really hung out in this part of space.<br />
<br />
I made it back to my station where I enjoyed looking for the 'jump in station' button after jumping through all those star gates. This is why one does not play tired.<br />
<br />
Next. I can undock again and make sure I can see the new ships in my overview. I am making the assumption that still has to be fixed by hand. Then I can learn to scan again and find my first tiny wormhole.<br />
<br />
Why was I so worried about being killed? What would it matter? This is a positive to aloneness that I had not much thought about.<br />
<br />
With my body and ship bonded back together (I will forever believe I am the ship. I hate the crew lore.), I had only to fiddle with my overview settings to add whatever new ships are around.<br />
<br />
Confession time: I never really used a bunch of overviews. I had a somewhat sparse one for PvP without a lot of the floating junk but that was it. I find that I am a mediocre HUD user. I noticed in the Division 2 that I look for on screen queues more than I do the indicators on the map. When my friend turned on fog of war I didn't actually notice a difference because I don't rely on the display that much day to day.<br />
<br />
However, I do know the importance of the overview and I'm sure I can remember what button to press to d-scan at some point. It is a button. Or button combo. Somewhere on my keyboard. And if I am going to go play in the danger zone I need to pretend to give myself the opportunity to escape.<br />
<br />
But, when I opened my overview, all teh ships were there. I guess that got pushed at some point.<br />
<br />
<br />
As for the true update with Animal Crossing: Whitney has moved in and I decided to pay off my last mortgage loan for my basement. So, that is all paid off and now I can focus on the redesign of my island to ship the villagers over and give my house an island in between the orchard and the meadow.Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-73965207812351483812020-07-25T19:54:00.000-04:002020-07-25T19:54:08.917-04:00Where on earth could she be?Naomi moved out and after an exhaustive search I settle on inviting Whitney to the island. It is a snooty villager for a snooty villager trade which was not my goal. I quite like her however and should be able to make it work. That brings my wolf population to three...<br />
<br />
Ahh... okay so yeah, jump clones are the question for tonight. I totally forgot how they worked. Something, something facility, jump, body, something? Ugh. I can leave myself one place and jump another I believe. And only some stations accept jump clones.<br />
<br />
Rather sad from the girl that used to run a Rorqual and provide clones for people.<br />
<br />
I had this idea to make another clone and some stuff, but it is way too late. I docked up my mighty orange Astero and jumped into a clone that I have somewhere else in the galaxy.<br />
<br />
Also, can I lock my UI into a scaled version? It is way to small on my monitors.<br />
<br />
Did I always have to pay to leave a jump clone somewhere? I really do not know. I only have three and I suspect I installed them a long, long time ago.<br />
<br />
I jumped and wound up somewhere else. Genesis. Why do I have a clone here? Why does no one sell shuttles anywhere around here?<br />
<br />
I think I am stuck for the night. The dogs need to go out and I have work in the morning. I'll take my 20 jumps back to my ship a bit later.Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-33270369828861335882020-07-24T12:00:00.000-04:002020-07-24T12:00:02.778-04:00Take three.... and action!Uhh.... so... uhh... (<i>search: how to screenshot eve online</i>)... okay back on line.<br />
<br />
It is time to be rebellious. In my Astero (<i>really... the freaking e...</i>) decision making I supped upon the devine spread of Jita. Sure, I can save ISK but I'm docked here having my logs fill with enough spam to eat my entire raid setup. My husband will wonder why I want yet larger hardrives...<br />
<br />
As always, I'm cautious. I stare at the prices. I check locations. I click the price tab to make sure I am sorting them properly. I am a good girl. Then, I notice that there are three sale orders put in almost at the same time. The one I was going to get is brand new and sitting at 89 days. But these three orders a further down for just a few hundred K ISK more and they are going to expire.<br />
<br />
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<br /></div>
Man, I remember that. Always having to adjust prices or just putting stuff on the market and seeing. But then you get under cut and under cut and your stuff expires.<br />
<br />
Not today, Satan. (<i>Satin is the silky stuff. I'm good at this.</i>) Someone that I do not know and may not even like will not have to renew this order. They will never know why I purchased this, but that is okay. They may not even notice. That is also okay.<br />
<br />
Now I have my overpriced by 260k frigate. Thanks to the handy, dandy little red dog I know where it is. (<i>Why does the dot have to be red? Can I change it?)</i> I know I fit into it because I am in the bigger version.<br />
<br />
And, ta da. I am now in an unfit Astero. My first thought is that it is very ugly. Let me tell you right now, I am never going to get undocked at this rate but this little ship is ugly. Now, I am normally not a fan of the red/yellow color spectrum but this Deathglow Hunter skin is rather nice. I also like the One Eden skin but it is a billion ISK. So, yeah no.<br />
<br />
Now, Deathglow Hunter skinned I can do the less important task of fitting the ship. Which is not a good thing. I remember stuff changed. The modules all moved around. No more just use this one and not that one. They all have values and a bit here and a bit there.<br />
<br />
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<br />
I was never good at fitting ships when I kinda knew what I was doing. I started with the basics. Dig through the containers I did have and start using the good stuff. Then downgrade if I needed to and hope for the best. Also, drones. Those cute little suckers. Did they change them too?<br />
<br />
Now, dear reader, I could look this up. I really could. But, why? This is much more fun.<br />
<br />
Until it wasn't.<br />
<br />
I have a T2 damage control unit. That is probably bad but whatever, I can take it back off. Also a microwarp drive and some scanning stuff. I'm doing well. Digging through my hangar it seems that I have a bunch of pieces but two high slots in and I've run out of CPU to do anything else. My hopes... my dreams... what are they? Now I have to solve this problem....<br />
<br />
And it turns out I had grabbed an expanded probe launcher which knocked me down to 4 CPU. VP figured it out for me. Well, with that hurdle solved the rest of it came together. I undocked my newly christened Sherbert into a brave new world...<br />
<br />
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<br />
<br />
...and promptly realized I had put on the wrong cloak when I went to warp. I turned back around and redocked to switch. Then I realized I also forgot probes.<br />
<br />
That's fine. That's fine. This is a Brave New World we are entering. This is a strong orange Astero that don't need no probes... actually it does so I got some. And some extra. 100? Probably for the best at this point. What else are holds for?<br />
<br />
The moral of the story is: Don't just stick modules to your ship? Something, something. Actually there isn't one.<br />
<br />
My boys are going hunting. I feel a little bit of disappointed excitement. Oh my, oh my. Who am I?<br />
<br />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-60133468654585859122020-07-23T20:31:00.002-04:002020-07-23T20:31:44.339-04:00Billion ISK unlocked (I think)I turned off my sound.<br />
<br />
Well... first I had to turn on my computer's sound. I traded my husband the surround sound system I was not using properly for a sound bar. In our new place he has the entire basement and his office is in a long, rectangular room where half is for VR. Anyway, he can use the surround sound properly because he can mount it behind him.<br />
<br />
I also fixed my photo from yesterday. I am rusty.<br />
<br />
I am working on a crochet blanket. The yarn just came in today so I am quite excited to see how it looks. I am about to hit my work weekend and the nice part about no longer being on the CSM or running TCS is that I don't feel any pressure to log in before and after work. My work days are still 12 hours.<br />
<br />
My blue cow, Naomi has packed her house. I'm going to go hunting for a new villager tomorrow. I really want a second horse for my island to compliment Sevannah. I messed up inviting Colton. I just got distracted and went to bed. Oh well, we will see who I find.<br />
<br />
As for ships, let's see if this tiny frigate in wormhole thing works for me. I'm going to get an Astero.<br />
<br />
(Man, if you suck at spelling Eve is a pain in the butt. Astero has an e in it.)<br />
<br />
In Jita they cost 50 million if I pluck one off of the market. Whoops. That was yesterday. Today it looks like it is 56 million. Oh well. I only have like 18 billion liquid ISK on Sugar. I never liquidated my assets. So, I'm probably okay to buy a few.<br />
<br />
.......Huh... how much do I have? Gimmie a minute to search some accounts.<br />
<br />
According to the valuation, Sugar's stuff is worth 60 billion. <br />
My TCS account is worth 59 billion with 12 billion liquid. <br />
My main support character seems to have almost 8 billion liquid and a net of 15.<br />
<br />
So, I think I finally hit that 100 billion goal I set for myself a long time ago. Whoops. I missed it.<br />
<br />
Sugar can afford this Ast'e'ro. (stupid e). Vov suggested a super basic fit for exploration. If anyone has any suggestions let me hear it. I'm pondering a gas Venture as well... err it has a name, I'll look it up later.<br />
<br />
I'll see what I can do with this little frigate.<br />
<br />
As for my crochet: I am trying to get this shawl finished. I'm about halfway, I believe.<br />
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<br />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-73064461579282682052020-07-22T22:12:00.002-04:002020-07-23T19:48:16.328-04:00What are all of these buttons for?My snooty villager, Naomi, wants to move out. I picked her because she is a blue cow with some wild makeup but we have not really bonded like I have with Savannah and Mitzi... oh wait yeah wrong game.<br />
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So, my clan is almost finished the second step of the Manhunt in Division 2. We just have one more zone to clear and then we can hunt down the secondary target to reveal the next... err wait, waaaaaiittt...</div>
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Sorry about that.</div>
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Resetting things.</div>
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What do I want to do? That has been my problem for a while now. If I play Eve, what do I want to do in Eve? While I did PvP it was never my draw. The old PvE sucks. The new PvE may be okay but do I want to do it?</div>
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Who am I?</div>
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What am I?</div>
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And do I need to be unique and interesting?</div>
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I think that I may want to look in small wormholes and try a exciting, fragile life. With some of the ships that are available I can, perhaps, have an interesting life where I may or may not fall prey to someone but it does not have to define what I do. There is so much of Eve that I do not know. </div>
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Does Sugar even know how to scan? I have several very well trained support characters but Sugar was always a pew pew pilot. I built her that way. She was Chella's backup and I branched her off to learn weapons while Chella made me money. Really, Sugar has always been a money pit. I have my entire staff for my store. Chella and Cat's Play mine and do industry. I have three fully trained jump and freighter pilots to handle my two jump freighters and my little personal freighter fleet.</div>
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None of them are Sugar.</div>
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She is kinda useless. However, it looks as if I have spent some time upping her various skills whenever I logged on and off. Her scanning skills are all maxed out. Her ship skills are very, very spotty. </div>
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I also sucked at ship fitting before. I like to plug stuff in that I like. This entire mathematical formula to maximize your perpetual is not my play style. It never has been but it is such an annoyingly integrated part of Eve. For me, it is unfun. Just boo. </div>
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Right now I am in a cruiser I believe. The SOE one with the pretty circle around it. That is much better than the battleship the SOE Emulsifier Blender. What a strange name for a ship. </div>
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I mean really, look at this: </div>
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<img alt="Nestor" src="http://www.ravestats.com/public/fen/05012015080026nestor-4rr-02.jpg" height="250" width="400" /></div>
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And this:<br />
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I made soup with one of these yesterday and I bet you cannot tell which one. </div>
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I am going to hit someone up for some fits. Maybe even try the little mining frigates to really mess around. I never had a problem with mining.</div>
Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-48373604863875661102020-07-19T21:50:00.004-04:002020-07-19T21:50:53.772-04:00Jumping out of the pastThere is some amusement to being out of touch. Many features are mysterious and new. Unfortunately, old habits still chase me around and nip at my heels.<br />
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I forgot that I jumped out of my slave implants. I, at some point had a moment of practical sense and sent Sugar to her training clone. It is a +4. I never did get a +5. That was always to fancy for my lifestyle. However, I forgot that I was practical and I logged in to jump out of them. I was actually thinking of jumping into an empty clone but I found I was sitting in a training one.<br />
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Unexpected.<br />
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Then, I looked for my salve to figure where I had left them. I never did much clone jumping. I only had the slaves for the rules of SnuffBox's fleet doctrine. I had tended to stick to training clones or avoid implants all together. It was part of my defense mechanism about being someone elses killboard feast.<br />
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And that is when I saw the 'amulet' implants. Detached I may be, but Amulet implants I never did see.<br />
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As with my other attempts to wander back into Eve, I decided to pick an area that was holding me back. What had I not explored in the game and why?<br />
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Fear of ridicule has been a defining thing for me. People mistake it as not wanting to make mistakes or thinking that I am to good for failure. It is none of these things. I do not enjoy being bullied. I am not competitive and I do not care if I win or lose. I enjoy working with others and I will assist others in their efforts and support them. I do not personally care about the outcome as a defining thing about me. I am disappointed if I am trying for something and I do not succeed but competition is no driver for me.<br />
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Eve is a competitive game even if you do not try to be competitive. In normal times, I would have ignored all of the competitive aspects. But I wound up in an area where it was the lifeblood of the game. I crawled into a round hole my square peg never fit into and tried to make it work until it did not.<br />
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My fear was not in failing. Eve is a video game. My fear was to fail the people around me and not live up to their standards. To fail would be to give them reason to criticize me. Ridicule, vicious language, mockery et all are a normal part of banter that I do not enjoy. I played in desperation to stay under this radar.<br />
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That has defined much of playing Eve for me. I wanted to fit in. I wanted to be valuable and useful to people. I wanted to belong and to that end I tried to create my game.<br />
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And, I failed.<br />
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At the moment I am playing the Division 2 with 2 friends. We coordinate our days off and spend time playing. We all have very different work schedules but we manage to play about twice a week on average. That game reminds me a ton of Eve. There are gear sets, talents give random percentages based of of timers. You can build up a set or tear it down, changing focus as damage or support. You can craft gear sets and hunt down rare gear to create these amazing things.<br />
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I do none of that. I wear stuff that lets me play. I have guns that I like because I like them. I have a DPS build that is fairly nerfed but I don't care. I just enjoy playing with my friends. I could spend time building a better character but I do not want to because I do not find that fun.<br />
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Playing Eve right has never been fun to me. And my implants have been a reflection of that.<br />
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I don't care if I am killed in Eve. I don't want to be the best. I don't want to be the worst. I don't want to be anything. But I tried for a very long time to be something and when everything else gave I didn't have a real me there playing.<br />
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I enjoy flying around Eve so very, very much. It is a beautiful game. One filled with fascinating and amazing people. There are so many things I miss about the interactions in Eve.<br />
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But I think that there is part of what I was that needs to retire if I am to figure out how to play again in any true way.Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-77144030098464020582020-07-18T23:18:00.001-04:002020-07-18T23:18:44.868-04:00Hello VoidThe idea of screaming into the void always appealed to me. I will admit, the screaming part is unnecessary. I was never prone to utterances of extreme volume. But the void, a place to come and create was always appealing.<br />
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Where have I been?<br />
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In many ways I stopped blogging. Both here and my personal blog. I need to correct my day to day activities. I have a lot to write about. The dogs. The house. My hobbies.<br />
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The stoppage was a mixture of exhaustion and the job position that I moved to during my second CSM term. I had more tasks to do which came with greater responsibilities. I actually wrote so much at work that my other writing faded away through exhaustion. Add in the CSM burnout and I just walked away from some things.<br />
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Now, I find that I am finally out past my NDA. It was not a point that I set as any type of personal goal. I just happened to realize that it was July and the last time I thought of Eve was when a CSM post from <a href="https://twitter.com/whispous">whispous </a>crossed my reddit feed.<br />
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I felt nostalgic. I liked whispous when I was in Snuffbox. He is one of the people I wish that I could have cultivated as a friend vs the polite acquaintance that we had. I find that one should seek out and keep good people in their lives and try to cultivate the ones that we find even if it does not work out.<br />
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Anyway, my nostalgia caused me to log into both twitter and Eve. How exciting. Then I found myself leaning forward and squinting. I do admit, it has been nine years since I started playing. Who would expect such a thing? But, it was my new monitors that were the actual problem. My husband upgraded me to a pair of curved 4k Samsung in January, right before the world set itself on fire and the US decided to eat glue as a national pastime.<br />
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This left me squinting at my screen going, "Eh?" and then I said, "Ahh" and carefully hit my F key's like someone learning hot cross buns on the piano until I remembered it was the ESC key. With my UI controls in hand I upped it to 175%, giggled, and found out that stations have changed again.<br />
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It is a quirk of fate and a side effect of childhood that leaves me not stirred by visual media. I may be the only person that find the billboards in the stations distasteful. I have not looked to see if they annoy anyone else. I spun my ship with the grace of long practice and smiled at the familiar comfort of my now empty channels.<br />
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I found my inventory filled with containers from things. I remembered that I logged in during Christmas. Perhaps these were they? I had no idea. Were they valuable? i still love collecting income in my games no matter how useless they are.<br />
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Sugar's skill queue is empty again. It is an ancient game, surpassed by the change in nature that skill points bring. but it is my ancient game. And I filled her skill queue and undocked to chase some of the newer choices on the market.<br />
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She is remarkably unbalanced with nothing in Caldari and Amarr. My old distastes have fallen to the wayside. Skill books are again fun. I still don't like missiles. Please do not think I have lost all of my mind.<br />
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The 'why' to play Eve is still there. I do miss people. I miss the people I would chat to. I often didn't talk to them as much as I wanted because I worried about bothering them with chatter. It has been an interesting bit of personal perspective over the last few years. I learned a lot about myself delaing with the social morass of the CSM.<br />
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And as for my NDA? Last year I was pointed to Jester or Ripard Teg or however one may know him doing an AMA on reddit. I found my lip curling a bit which amused me. It seems that part of me has not moved but so far away.<br />
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The NDA that we were issued was sent to us. We were to fill it out and ship the signed copy back to Iceland. The second term, it was all digital. The thing is the NDA was never properly followed by CCP. It had wording about how topics we were not to discuss were to be given to us in writing and such things. The actual steps to fulfill the NDA never happened. What we were following was nothing more than a NDA of morals. I had no problem with this.<br />
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I wasn't hiding anything. I just tried to coach myself in polite language. Instead of rolling my eyes and being snarky. I wanted to. I got more and more bitter about things but my goal was always what was productive and useful. What was my reason for being there? I was not there to be a bitch. I ran on the wrong platform for that. Nor was I there to call people out for their humanity. That was already happening to me. It meant that the NDA had little meaning for me and then later it was trying to figure out how to balance rumor, fact, and how useful was it to share how nasty and two faced some people were? I wasn't working for my fellow CSM and if one looked at my work you would see me kicking people when they overstepped my line. I ran off of my morals and values.<br />
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The stuff I did not share was stuff that I solved. There are several things that made me very, very mad. They are the core of my bitterness. However, I got those things taken care of with CCP as a company with employees not as a player to their developers. But the fact that they happened soured me. Mix that with my shattered in game relationships with my corporations and my entire support structure crumbled around me.<br />
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I floated until I fell.<br />
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It sucked. Some rumor did work its way out. I had someone come and try to interview me for the truth about the issues I addressed. I was told that it was my duty to share. Sigh. I feel so transparent yet people do not know me. I have never had any problem writing what I wanted to say when I felt it could or should be said.<br />
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There is some redemption. Those involved no longer work for the company. That helps the bitterness a bit. I am a bit black and white on these topics so grayness only makes me angry.<br />
<br />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-82524039453115663682019-12-11T23:35:00.001-05:002019-12-11T23:35:17.783-05:00Nothing and Everything ChangesI can mark the passage of time from Eve with Intuition's age. He turned four last month. Today, Corbexx sent me a chat on Steam and we spent hours chattering about this and that as if it was yesterday. That is friendship.<br />
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One of the things we noticed is that our NDA is about to expire. That and the leavings of several people left us gossiping up a storm. The NDA was never a good NDA but we chose to respect the spirit of it even if the letter of it had the strength of wet tissue paper.<br />
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Life is fine. The husband got a promotion at the start of the year. I am up for one at the end of the month that will be a fascinating life change. We also got our rental property goals started. For any that wonder how much of a basement dweller I actually am. My husband has the entire basement of the new house.<br />
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I think of Eve quite often. For one, I have it in my reddit feed. I mostly skim the titles and skip the topics. The general mood has not changed even if the people saying it has.<br />
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I saw that Snuff disbanded. It is always strange to watch pieces of your past disintegrate in the wind. But we all age. People. Corporations. Eve Online. Yet we stay the same.<br />
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I logged in. I forgot to redeem some of the trash that was given out for something I didn't notice. I sat watching Eve Uni while a null sec person chattered about what super someone should fly. Nothing changes and everything changes.<br />
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I have not kept up on the changes. I never paid the attention to the mechanics of a game that I did to Eve. It is nice to wander back into a place where I pick gear because it is pretty or I just click with it.<br />
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I also admit without embarrassment that I quite enjoy being able to hit pause.<br />
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Tisk.<br />
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Here is my current dog haul. Inty there is now 4. I've added more Afghan Hounds as well. I've been showing dogs for years but I was on hiatus when I was playing Eve. My last Afghan Hound passed away after I stopped playing. The red headed boy is from my lines and the young lady in the back is an out-cross for my plans.<br />
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<img height="194" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/ZH0kJSeNcKZKilIQquKvUtIgCxXX4yBMlLcVeC20OEiv_7gIj17_zkeacL6sBTQD3vJ7uJgdLlP0VPYswWKHGWep8xPJ8t_On2RFqLnILVr40rSnJ_Kg8loJQ7Ut7xXWTD49UAvpX59JKf5sATiiLr0o0ILzGDIj0eYrLlTsNUYXY3QnHrpM5W506T86fO-XVXPw8cRXeDoiDyIv1Jr51GQYCrbUOQSQ3OQ0LewDMeO5vI10f4dPp9QIAbaJ4NXSQoQnOQWKKC2sUpS6C9WxKD-fB5301j54CyAMClD0gLT09Iq3qmp5ec6C5QK7MRcNUyfBH1Z5uQTSLr7BIsrsiHaYfR1Qg2o10wcKDefQEf101I6BqHnpZ5RsnX2DReFc0WD1AFcHzrpZl52XjN76Iz_OdHJ3SOQRKqLabMz8ZTNd4E7wj6uns4RZb-eQ86QOlLAzBaKlYxJwu82u7Ryz7ssh3zHVyVLT7cdqYlfVUhxcpgwktBO9L4gFmZ-embPNHVukXhX6fqrS1-jvbBVzare1WJYWSY9RX2qi4zA9zobahurQOJ9SYSHUR1VCV66F-7HpaBMUUEXTS1zfhhGg_QHi6_B38vgD1rivt5k7zOLrrlspd2qGwEVDhzkm5eKFqyPWyzSO1-v8nVhnhU_6kBODHtKwbtWroH4Z-WqrMN2bDqYpD4Y57a4y=w1920-h935-no" width="400" />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-145338156989247762019-09-12T15:29:00.004-04:002019-09-12T15:29:48.679-04:00Passion is so circularI should dust the blog and delete the spam to leaks in through googles not so bad filters.<br />
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I log in from time to time to check my mail and see some of my friends. But, of lat I've commented on a few things in r/eve and it makes me think. Not of the impassioned things that I once thought about as I played the game but of the passions of the game.<br />
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I have the gift of several eve players are parts of my life. And we talk, but rarely about Eve. Most of them have left to some extent or another but the relationship that we gained is still strong. I do not hate Eve but I am still exhausted with Eve, even now when I am so far out. It seems to be CSM summit time and the anger and race that sits atop everything related to the game is still there.<br />
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It is interesting in its exhaustive existence. The passion is there and the player reaction continues to go full circle. Some things are still said the same way over, and over, and over again. Is it love? Is it hate? Or is it just stimulation that is itself addicting? I once thought I was close to an answer.<br />
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<br />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-10493089949730636722018-11-24T15:11:00.001-05:002018-11-24T18:24:57.608-05:00The Charm of the FamilarWith a few picked up a shifts at work due to the holidays. I pondered logging in but I didn't have the energy to do so. Being able to say no to logging in is pleasant. Just as my youngest puppy interrupts me every fifteen minutes to pee, going to sleep instead of staying up is also pleasant. I had a lot of short slept nights when I was active in a corporation.<br />
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My next plan has been to learn how to scan again. The new map is in and I need to refresh my scanning skills. My hold is full of probes. My ship appears to be reasonably set up. I remembered how to hit my F key to cloak. In fact, I hit it a bit to fast. I need to get the ebb and flow of the tic back down.<br />
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I am also rusty in my paranoia. I idly switch to another window to research breadbowls and the soup I want to make later. Then I remember I am sitting, decloaked, off of a gate somewhere. Whoops. I did figure out a breadbowl recipe and soup as well.<br />
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The question was where do I relearn to scan? I need somewhere off the beaten track a bit. Lower security level but not low sec. Just low enough to get some signals.<br />
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And I decided why fight it? I wandered back to Molden Heath. I know it well. The security level is what I need.<br />
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When I move on, I believe I will move to Derelik and look around. That is where I started so long ago when I joined my first corporation with the wide eyed innocence of any new player. It has never been a prime area but I have never been a prime player.<br />
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Once I have dropped a few probes I will scuff my feet, hem and haw, and try to join Signal Cartel. The thought is rather daunting.<br />
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<br />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-61789829691575677852018-11-17T09:05:00.001-05:002018-11-17T09:05:17.087-05:00Skill Points when you need themSugar has 125 million skillpoints. I stopped celebrating my skillpoint achivements with the skill point changes. I was rather bitter about them. Now, a bit further removed I don't disagree with them as much but I do not like them. However, I can admit that I felt their lure.<br />
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When fitting my most amazing NOW CLOAKING WHEN WARPED Stratios the other day I put in the t2 mid-slot analyzer thingy. I couldn't fit it. My first reaction was, "How could this be?" then I remembered that Sugar was never my scanning character. There are holes in her training.<br />
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Muttering, I opened the requirements tab of the analyzer and saw that it was a level 5 requirement. I was at level 4. It would be 4 days to train. That went against my do stuff now mindset. I found myself about to give in and buy skillpoints when I realized there had been another line when I looked at the requirements.<br />
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I had forgotten a very simple thing. I had unallocated skillpoints. I have collected them, passively, over the last few years. I never used them casually and now I had a million allocated skill points and I needed 600k.<br />
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Instant gratification tastes pretty damn good.Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-59554054735810537692018-11-16T22:51:00.001-05:002018-11-16T22:51:13.911-05:00Warping when CloakedSo... I went and got my pretty new ship. I got a skin for it. It was amazing. I fit it incorrectly and am happy with that.<br />
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I undocked. I chuckled to myself for never getting proper undocks and I warped off and discovered I cannot warp while cloaked. I was like what? What did I get wrong? I thought this was the ship for me. I booed and I hooed and I was quite distraught.<br />
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I logged on this evening and somewhere in the depths of my brain I said, "CovOps Cloak". As that oozed around my slender understanding I crept back and checked the cloak I had installed.<br />
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An improved cloaking device.<br />
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Whoops.<br />
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Back to the market I went. I peeked at my ship to check my idiot status. It seems it was rather low and my ship could in fact warp while cloaked. Overjoyed I switched out my cloak and took back off into the darkness.<br />
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Now I am one whole jump over but I'm very pleased with that one jump.Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-17438203788602007032018-11-15T20:01:00.002-05:002018-11-15T20:01:45.619-05:00Crystal Blast StratiosWhat a pretty ship.<br />
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My tastes have always been simple. I like the color blue. This would be perfect in blue and white instead of blue and black but it is near perfect and so sweetly, blue.</div>
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How does one fit a ship? One of the things I shed early in my Eve career was fitting my own ships. I'm not a min/max type of person and I dove into a PvP environment where my actions effected others. That gave me a responsibility to fit the 'best' way. In the end, I never learned how to fit ships in Eve on a deep, personal level. I am not interested in fitting tools or maximum stats. They are important in the game of Eve but not important to me.</div>
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But the habits run super deep. Looking at ship fitting makes me twitch. Not because I cannot put a ship together but because what I am inclined to do probably won't be the right thing and way. Then the memory of mockery and being paraded before others and mocked for ignorance tickles at me. It is my constant love hate with Eve. I enjoy the game but I dislike some social things about the game for the same reason I dislike sports. I'm not competitive and that urge to insult and belittle people for 'winning' is not something that I possess. It is not that I mind loss it is that being mocked saddens me. Not because I failed but because it is such an unpleasant aspect of human nature. But sometimes one has to learn to close their eyes and continue on. Similar to how I learned not to google myself to see what people were saying during the CSM.</div>
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I've always been that person that used the gear that they liked not because it was best. Rarely do I end a game with tiered gear with the best. I am heavily effected by the design. Similar to how ugly my Legion always was. Bafflingly ugly.</div>
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I was told they redid some of the looks. </div>
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But, a Sttratios I shall get and some scanning implants. And then I shall fly into the darkness to find some more skillbooks. I think I need to learn some ice harvesting skills and get a little ice ship for that. Maybe its finally time to play in wormholes for me.</div>
<br />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-64227935120415231302018-11-14T18:30:00.002-05:002018-11-16T12:41:05.264-05:00It may be time to join Signal Cartel<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The last time I took a screenshot was November 12th, 2017. I didn't notice until I looked for the one today. It also changed my entry into this post, but what is a girl to do?<br />
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I logged in to look at Stargates. After I left the CSM, I had to leave Twitter. Twitter is easy to fall into when you have people to talk to. I checked it regularly and I was in such a habit of checking and commenting and answering and responding that I had to remove it from all of my devices and force wean myself from the habit. The side effect is that now I do not check twitter very much, and when I do I'm reminded of the fun people that kept me playing Eve.<br />
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Today, it was just me and my Diplomatic Shuttle out to look at Stargates. My Jaguars have been irreparably broken by CCP and loaded with missiles. In case anyone wondered, I have missile skills. I simply refuse to use them. My Jaguars will forever sleep with their turrets loaded. I shall kiss them goodbye and turn out the hangar lights.<br />
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Times have changed. CCP has changed. I haven't changed to be fair. People go, "Sugar, you are still around?" Yuppers. Still here, living life, going to work, playing video games. I got back into showing dogs. I just haven't played Eve. One of the side effects of the CSM was that I lost my personal game in the process of becoming a representative for others. I became a conduit but a conduit is not full of its own thing. In a similar fashion my exterior was the same but my game became empty. When I left teh CSM, I lost the games of others that kept me going.<br />
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I don't regret leaving. And, I'll one day finish my story. It is all written, I just have to transcribe it here. That should be fun with CCP sold to a new company. I feel rather unfettered.<br />
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But today, I also learned that I no longer cared. It was a good thing. I had many cares preprogrammed into my gameplay. Most of those were aimed around not dying and becoming a target of others ridicule or allowing them to show power over you by being the person that killed you. Some of that is my personality and some of that is the culture that I absorbed. But time happens, people change, and scars that are left over from healing after the CSM have left some toughness there. I may not enjoy it but I really don't give a fuck. In a similar fashion to why I don't wear makeup. I don't have to be the Sugar people want to see. I'm the Sugar Kyle that I am. I am always going to be me and bending over backwards to try to become something else didn't work out in the emotional end.<br />
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I purchased a diplomatic shuttle. I'm pretty sure I have a bunch of them somewhere, but why look? It is rather cute. I never sat in one before even with their implementation being part of my CSM cycle. I picked the shuttle so that if someone killed me it'd be a little statement on my side. And then I undocked and flew around.<br />
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I no longer cared what the killboards said and what anyone would get out of killing me.<br />
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Why care? It isn't me to care. I don't have to please anyone with my activities. And with that I decided that maybe I didn't care enough that I could not care about my own rebellious knee jerk reaction to rules.<br />
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Let's see if I log in more than once.<br />
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Here is my crew. Inty just turned three, yesterday, for all those who remember when I brought him home. Anubis is 10 months and Phoenix 3 months. Anubis is my grandpuppy, I owned his grandfather. He and Phoenix are Afghan Hounds and my current crop of show dogs.<br />
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Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-68389370817844846472018-09-28T22:23:00.000-04:002018-09-28T22:23:13.773-04:00My Skill Queue went empty<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
The thing I miss most is having mail. When I log in I often check that line to see if I have mail. Unfortunately, I do not. I am not surprised. There is no reason for me to have mail. Yet, I do miss it.<div>
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In some ways having regular eve-mail was the moment that I was most connected. I had people to talk with and engage in. It was the closest I've ever been to having a normal social level that I was comfortable with. This shows you how introverted I am that eve-mail filled up my social meter. </div>
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I log in and look around. Normally, I am looking for the people that I do not have other social contacts with. It is very, very easy to lose those relationships. The binding glue of the game has dissolved and friendship, as an adult, can take work. Even in this information time. Eve gave me things to talk about. Without it, I remember that I don't talk very much. Unless it is about dogs and driving my co-workers crazy when people come to me for advice they won't follow.</div>
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Since I logged in, I went to fill my skill queue. I still havent learned my T3s to V. Stubbornness for the sake of it. However, I realize that I don't have the T3D installed so I went about and took care of that. My Eve habit sare not fully dead. I made sure not to blindly buy things and check my zeroes. </div>
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The advent of skill injections sucked the joy of training from me. I find that I sit upon a stubborn little hill. One where I ignore skill injections while understanding that my habits of training and time are from an era past. I do miss those little milestones and the joy that came with them.</div>
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But things change and so does CCP. I was sent a few articles and dipped my toe into the edge of the discussion over CCP being sold. I didn't dip far. Really up to my nail polish and that was about it.</div>
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I do admit, I am glad I am not on the CSM with that discussion. I will also say that I am not surprised. Instead, I chuckled. I hate being right about some things. I wish I had been surprised instead. But the sale has happened and I will see if my predictions come true. I have made the ones that I hope happen and the ones that I believe will happen. </div>
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Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-32849121687467015652018-07-09T11:45:00.003-04:002018-07-09T11:45:39.589-04:00The lack of perfectionI had the pleasure of having <a href="https://evewho.com/pilot/Keskora+Yaari">Keskora Yaari</a>. We met a bit after I started the CSM and hit it off. As friendships often do it developed into being about the people and not the medium that we met each other in. My new house has a guest room (my previous one was taken over by my mother who moved in and never moved out) and it was fun to have someone in that I could babble about a large part of my last six months of house renovations.<br />
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I tried to pamper and spoil her. Those are always the most fun things to do when a friend comes over. I did make sure she was stuffed full of local interesting things. It is only fair, after all. My abilities as a host have improved and I was pleased with myself.<br />
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One of our interesting links, outside of Eve, is dogs. We are both dog people. Over my years blogging I have discussed and shared time my creatures. From the passing of Nyx to the acquisition of Intuition. He is doing great by the way. He is two and a half now!<br />
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We discussed Eve some but it wasn't the focus of things. Yet, so many things wander back to Eve's interactions with our life and the people that we met.<br />
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I have another puppy (dog number three). He is an Afghan Hound, a breed I have had for a long time. I didn't mention my dogs as much for some parts of my Eve career. That is because there seemed to be little interest in my corp and little interest or sympathy when I mentioned pets passing. Being that it is very personal to me, I just gathered up that bit of myself and moved it mostly to the side.<br />
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However, Keskora is also a dog person and I dragged her to a dog show while she was there. I was entered with my youngest puppy, a six month old terror. I expected... problems. I let my hope get in the way and I hoped that my puppy would give me the performance I wanted from him.<br />
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It didn't happen. I wound up in tears with treats hanging from my pockets as I tried to get him to act as if he had not been trapped in a box and beaten his entire life. I got a lot of pity and a lot of suggestions to work with my dog. It was humiliating. It is also a very common occurrence when it comes to starting puppies. Dog shows are over whelming and puppies often shut down when things get to be too much for them. Unfortunately, you never know until you do it.<br />
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It sucked, we went home and had a great dinner and life moves on. The next morning I woke up rather down. I won't lie and say that I bounce back from humiliation well. I don't. I never have. I suck at pretending that I do. Failure is a part of life and one I am okay with. I know that I am not a perfect person. And in these times, I seek advice.<br />
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What I could not find was advice about people being humiliated by their dogs and how they worked through it or just that their dogs grew up. All I found was people discussing how perfect their dogs are because they worked with them.<br />
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How much I was reminded of when I started Eve. As I floated off into the distance, trying to figure out how to turn my ship, it took my 30 minutes to find a post on the old Eve forums that told me to double click. That moment was the founding of my blog and my blog was founded upon my own humanity. It was not my ego that drove me to write. I enjoy writing for the sake of producing words. It was my desire to not be alone in my imperfection. And if I was alone maybe I could stop someone else from being alone too. Perhaps that is ego but I'd prefer to think of it as desperation.<br />
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I'm not a social person. I do better these days but I am an introvert and easily exhausted by being around any but my closest firmness. My job requires a lot of interaction with strangers and it drains me of any other social need. My life is more a constant state of recovery from work then a need to go out and seek stimulation.<br />
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Finally, some people came out and discussed the struggles of working with young dogs. It took a bit of a plea on my part to stop being told to spend time with my dogs and to get people to admit that their dogs also took work.<br />
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This is what reminded me so much of my time playing Eve. It also makes me wonder about myself. What key do I miss that causes me to admit to my mistakes and embarrassments? Maybe it is why I never became a super powered player. I guess it is that lack of confidence. I do wonder at times, and I admit a bit of Envy.<br />
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I wish, I could stand and with cocky arrogance announce that I am amazing as if my flaws did not matter.<br />
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I suspect it has been one of my fatal flaws with Eve.Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-49046329584269124822018-04-17T19:41:00.000-04:002018-04-18T10:23:43.488-04:00Will the real player please stand up?I installed Eve on my Surface the other day. I then remembered why my last laptop, when I was playing Eve, was an Alienware gaming laptop. My Surface, wonderful creature that it is, runs Eve at such a tiny magnification that I squint to see it. I could change my settings and adjust for this. Instead, I'll stick to my desktop and try to remember to log in and see the latest round of changes.<br />
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Yet, here I am writing.<br />
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Deep in the muzzy field of my brain that has been working almost daily for the last six weeks, random thoughts bubble up. I may not log in and spend my time focusing on Eve as a world, but it hasn't slipped from me. I've picked up an amazing group of friends that I talk to daily and many of them still play enough that I skim the social edges. At times I'm angry that the same social problems exist. At others, I'm fascinating by the process.<br />
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Today is a fascinating day because I've been answering e-mails. I still get e-mails occasionally from people who have read the blog. I admit that I don't check my mail as I used to. The focus of two years the CSM took its toll in ways I am still discovering.<br />
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I've always loved getting e-mail about Eve. Many people are very open with me about their struggles in the game. It is a reflection of the openness I tried to create here. While on some level, I've often wanted to be perfect and amazing my rational mind knows that I am know. I've shared my flawed self because that is the self that played the game. That is the self that people eventually elected to represent them. In sharing those flaws I made myself safe to some who needed a place to share their struggles with the game or just ask me how I managed.<br />
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That is what led to this wandering introduction about Role-Play.<br />
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The eternal question in Eve is what is it missing. What will make people stay? What keeps some of us coming back and others running away? What burns us out?<br />
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As I answered this e-mail just a few minutes ago, I found myself commenting on role play. Eve doesn't have Role-Play. Not in a grand scheme that makes the game go. There is associative love to groups, ships, and organizations. People pick their team and fight for it with passion. But never was I the blue haired beautiful Minmatar woman that my avatar represented. I was always me, the player, and my character was my gameplay across all of my accounts with Sugar as its focus.<br />
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No, there wasn't roleplay in its basic sense. Yet, Eve is full of roleplay. From the corporate leaders to the fleet commanders. To those that spend hours constructing great ships and others that manages thousands of resource facilities. Few people in Eve are the person that plays Eve.<br />
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How did such an introverted person as I, someone that won't even go to friends cookouts, wind up where I did? While the person that I am was not fake, the Role that I played was something I never could have seen myself doing. And when I look around at the players I have known, so many of them are not who you think. The fleet, cold blooded pirate that manages accounting for a car dealership. The burger cook that leads specialty fleets. The day laborer that manages ten thousand highly skilled pilots. The quiet, reserved IT people that mange thousands of people, fight sweeping battles, and plot complex tactics that are beautiful enough to weep.<br />
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While we may not role play in its basic nature, we play roles in this game. They develop. Some are given. Some are taken. Most are gained. We become, we change, we grow into and fall from the heights that are created. It is in the success of the player that the role grows. But that success must be carved from almost nothing. Rarely does it work if it is handed over.<br />
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Eve has always fascinated me by what people become when given the chance and free of the hindrances that our physical reality is filled with. It may not be traditional, but little of the game is, despite the best efforts.<br />
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Absorbing. Exhausting. Fascinating. Heartbreaking. We create something from ourselves. For good or bad. It tends to follow us. To be something that we can look at and manipulate in the contemplation of self. It may be another reason why Eve sticks to its players with such intensity.<br />
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<br />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-44877558125232412202018-04-08T11:55:00.003-04:002018-04-08T11:55:47.981-04:00Personal SagasI think next weekend we'll finally have our townhouse for rent. Geesh, this has not been the smooth process I tried to plan for back in November. Also, I picked up a silly amount of overtime through the end of this month. I couldn't turn down the money but its complicated everything. Also, I have a new puppy and he does not believing in sleeping the night. However, Intuition is in love with having someone to play with nonstop. Autumn spends her time hiding under our chairs from the obnoxious boys.<br />
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Will I ever finish my CSM saga. Yes. I really need several hours per post and right now my day is this:<br />
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Get up at 0830 - Walk puppy. Play with puppy. Eat food. Make lunch for work<br />
0930 - Go to work (some days I have to be in at 0830).<br />
2230 - Get home from work<br />
2232 - Walk puppy<br />
2230-0000 - Play with puppy, make dinner, eat dinner, play with puppy, shower, climb in bed, fight for space from Inty and Autumn. Have Inty lay on my legs. Sleep.<br />
0230 - Wake up to screaming puppy, take him potty<br />
0600 - Wake up to screaming puppy, take him potty, feed him breakfast, put him away. Crawl back in bed wondering why I got a puppy.<br />
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Normally my mom wakes up around the 0730 screaming fit and takes him out again<br />
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That is my super condenses schedule. In there I'm lacking the 2-4 hours I spend editing the CSM posts into a more coherent story! But once I have regular days off again and the puppy sleeps the night (I anticipate that in the next month) so that I am sleeping again and my days off are not spent renovating houses, I'll be back on track.<br />
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Until then, I have a few rough drafts on random thoughts. I think about Eve a lot. I don't follow it but I think about it. I truly love the concept of the game and the possibilities. It is in many ways my ideal game world by concept. The execution doesn't go as smoothly and like my move and renovation project of this last winter, planning and experience don't always give you as much of an edge as you might wish for it too.Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-50116160559872421982018-02-25T13:15:00.003-05:002018-02-25T13:15:55.707-05:00TimeThe last two months has been interesting. It is one of the first times in my life that I have been to busy to do extra things. I went to work and when I was not at work, I worked on my new house. Those days were often 12-14 hours long. When I went home, I also worked. There, I packed, cooked, or slept. Even my dogs started to wonder why I was no longer at home.<br />
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The interesting part was that the mountain of work that I had before me was so high that I could not see the effort and time that went into it. The only time I did was when I tried to schedule other things in and fell off track. After that, it was exhaustion and the misery that comes with it that made me wonder if I had failed in my task or if I was so worn out that I was no longer doing a good job of looking at the situation.<br />
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Last weekend we moved. The house is not done, but it is ready enough to move in. That has come with the next side effect of having to clean out our old home. Things of course went wrong and people have not participated in their tasks as they should have.<br />
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I thought of Eve. Sometimes it was because I was packing my Eve memories. From sculptures and trinkets to my Fanfest and Eve Vegas passes. I found notebooks from CSM meetings. I have a little stack of them.<br />
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The time that I had to play Eve changed. When I first started, I was working a midnight shift. Then I changed to a day shift and my game changed as well. My time was different and what I could do inside of that time changed. The CSM came and in many ways it worked better with my time. I've lamented that going out and playing Eve became a struggle simply because prime time for the groups I ran with clashed with things like work, cooking, and sleeping. I even horrified some by asking them to look at their home life and see who had more free time and who did not. Cooking a meal or two ate into hours of my free time each day. I am the only one in the house that cooks. But that thought went over poorly.</div>
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Yet, I know it is not me. I've watched peoples time ebb and flow. Even now, I hear my friends that still play struggle with time and suffer from guilt for not having enough for the game.</div>
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Time is a rather dense substance for how intangible it is.</div>
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My desktop has been off for a week. The moving problems mean my husbands servers are not on. This annoys him. The time problems mean we have not wired the house to the extent that it needs. This is frustrating. It will soon end. We will recover our time but I find myself wondering what would have happened to my Eve world and life if I was still active.</div>
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One of the most horrifying things I ever read was another blogger's anger that someone could not make it to a scheduled event. It was outside of Eve, but the venom in the response was unexpected. I take my gaming seriously. I take my commitments to people in my life, even if that life is only connected through my screen, seriously. Yet, sometimes one has to call out of work. Sometimes we cannot do what we wanted to do. Sometimes life hands us an opportunity that unsettles us. </div>
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I'd never want someone to skip an opportunity in their life for a social commitment to me. Maybe that comes from my want to be friends with those I play. Perhaps my relationship is not casual enough. It might be my lack of competitive nature as well.</div>
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But, I have finally reached an event in my life where I could not win, even with willpower, against time.</div>
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It has been interesting. I'm glad it is almost done.</div>
Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-84148085854503669292018-01-28T18:39:00.002-05:002018-01-28T18:39:47.095-05:00PhewLet me tell you, spending a month working on a house is exasperating. We closed December 21st. I ad five more days of work and then I took 3 weeks off. We've done a lot. Not as much as I had hoped but one does come across unexpected events while renovating.<br />
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In some ways I'm horrified by how gross the previous owners were. There is so much cleaning and differed maintenance. The house is just drinking in the care. And the money. Yeesh.<br />
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I'm back to my normal work schedule. Sadly, my free days are still spent at the house. We have the kitchen floor to finish and the half bath on the main floor before we can move in. Hopefully, we will be done those things by next weekend and we can finish packing and start the moving process.<br />
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Of course, the side effect is that our current place needs to be cleaned up and we are going to try our hand at landlording.<br />
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But, I'll wander back to writing and maybe poking my head into Eve again now that my schedule is starting to return to sanity. 10-12 hours a day working on the house has left me feeling not quite as young as I once did.<br />
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Bonus update on Intuition. He was modeling the stairs I was staining (staining is done, now I have to repaint the white. I'll do the rails and banisters after we move.)<br />
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<br />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-238324579504790.post-89664258398893380662017-12-29T00:13:00.003-05:002017-12-29T00:13:43.076-05:00Memoirs - Part Fifteen: After Iceland<div style="text-align: center;">
Virtual Realities: Memoirs of an internet spaceship politician</div>
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by Sugar Kyle CSM9, CSMX</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><u><b style="font-family: "times new roman";">After </b><span style="font-family: times new roman;"><b>summit</b></span><b style="font-family: "times new roman";"> mints</b></u></i></span><br />
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The Summer Summit was my second trip to Iceland. My first had been in 2013 when deep in my love for Eve, I went to Fanfest. I liked Fanfest well enough. I liked Iceland well enough. I wasn't going to do it on my own dime, again. It was an expensive trip for what I got out of it. But now, I found myself looking at a ticket paid for by CCP for me to go to Iceland. I struggled to understand that it was happening to me.<br />
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There was some stress with the tickets. We had some arguments about hotel stays. I felt high maintenance, but Iceland is five hours ahead of the Eastern Cost of the United States. My flight would leave at 2000 hours my time and arrive at 0600 hours in Iceland. The first plan was for us to just 'hang out' at the office until our hotel rooms were available around 1500 hours. With a lot of discussion, permission was granted to prebook our rooms so that when we arrived at the hotel around 0730-0800, we could check in and pass out.<br />
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We were also told that we were fortunate to not share our rooms. It seems that it had been habit in the past to share rooms. I was very glad that I did not have to fight that fight. I do not think I would have accepted a trip if I had to share rooms with a stranger. That would have been too far outside of my comfort level.<br />
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In the end, we arrived in Iceland. I got in, and went to sleep. I got up around noon and met Corbex and Sion in person for the first time. A missmatched pair the three of us were but our bond poured over into real life. We went out adventuring. We got Sion to eat rotting shark. We discovered where CCP's office was and we set up a gameplan to arrive early enough to nab seats and be prepared the following morning.<br />
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The first person we met was Hilmar, the CEO of CCP. He was there eating breakfast. CCP feeds its employees. Breakfast is normally cold cereals and sandwiches. However, they sometimes hot have breakfast. Our liaison was able to request this hot breakfast. It made people in the office super happy. That is how we walked into the CEO eating eggs at the conference table.<br />
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Interesting and awkward we sat around the head of the company. We had been able to eat in the cafeteria, another strange and uncomfortable situation. I felt lout of place. Every momenta nd action made me wonder how I had reached this place and what was I doing there. Now, the CEO enjoyed his eggs and I could not figure out how I had reached this point.<br />
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Hilmar is an interesting person. He has a lot of presence and he has a lot of passion. Yet, as I listened to him I could feel the disconnect between where I was as a player and where his vision lay. I had no doubt that he cared passionately about the game world that he had helped create. But what Eve was to him and what Eve was to me and the people that had come to me were two different things. The CSM was supposed to be that bridge but sitting there, invited, knowing that my opinion was wanted, I wondered if we'd be able to actually cross the bridge that had been built.<br />
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Meeting my fellow CSM was not magical. I kept having these hopes that things would coalesce into this amazing moment of energy and cooperation. In the end, I found myself on the defense as much as the offense. I talked a lot. If there was something to be said I'd look around and see quiet faces and step forward with my lists of work. I'd pull out my notebooks and go over everything I could possibly address.<br />
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We also did a lot of contact. We asked people to join the Skype groups. We set up secondary meetings. We asked them to tell us about what they were doing and what they wanted from us. We met a large group of passionate people with amazing ideas about the game and at the end of the week, exhausted, we felt better about the game then we ever had before.<br />
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There were a lot of honest things said. There has been and I assume there will continue to be discussion about releasing everything to the public. The problem is it doesn't let people talk frankly. I've found that people request frankness and raw information and then get upset about it. If a concept is introduced and discussed and discarded, people get angry that it even came up. If language or topic becomes unprofessional, someone else is up in arms about behavior. It is unfortunate that it is so often counter productive to share. I want to share it but casual conversation can damage trust.<br />
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Each day I'd write about what we did. Since I could not share the actual talks I shared everything else. The hotel, the food, the activities. I shared it because that was the only thing that I could demystify. I let people know when I went to bed and when I got up. It was so often said to be a vacation but it turned into ten hours of meetings and several after hours of discussions. Then a write up, bed, and back to it.<br />
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When I flew back home, I got in on the 2000 flight. I got home, ate a huge salad (American style salads are hard to find in Europe) and went to bed. In the morning I went to work and the following evening I started to write the meeting minutes. Each day our liaison had bundled the minutes and sent them to us. A very hopeful schedule had been set to have them release in only a few weeks.<br />
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It seems that not everyone was obsessed over doing the minutes. I had been told to put my money where my mouth was by one of the incumbent CSM members. It enraged me and I decided to translate every scrap of the minutes that I could get passed CCP. No one would say that I had not participated or short changed anyone. It meant that occupied with my plans and projects, I missed subtle things going on around me. It also does not help that I am prone to casting off connections that might feed me information but often did nothing but make me uncomfortable. The fame and access of my position did not sit well with me and as I sunk deeper into it, it did not seem important to me. I was producing and sharing what I spent my time doing with those who wanted to hear it.<br />
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The Deal was a document. This document started as an action by one of the CSM members who was a fleet commander in null security space. The document was supposed to be a collection of ideas and wants by the major players of null security space. At some point, they asked CCP if they would like to see some type of general consensus from the various leaders of null sec. It had long been held as a fact that change was desired on a universal sale but there was no proof of this. The Deal was a document that should have solidified that proof.<br />
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I thought it was a good thing. It is easy to say, “Some people want this,” with no proof that those people want it. In my own start in the game, with my first corporation, the CEO used this particular play quite often to explain why he did not pay the corporation members their share for work. He said that we voted and that ‘people’ voted for the corporation to keep the proceeds.<br />
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The desired change to sovereignty mechanics in null security space was a very important topic for members of the counsel engaged in that type of space. They wrote up a general outline about what they wanted from null security space and they started to sign it. However, the document in the end was written by another member than the one who had proposed it. The original proposer was not around. He often vanished for months at a time. With the Summit behind us and the future of null security space on the table, it was decided to push for the document.<br />
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I was asked to sign the document and I said no thank you. The document was supposed to be a supported ideal of sovereignty in null security space. I had no experience with that area of game play. I was not going to sign my name to a document saying I approved of mechanics and gameplay that I was ignorant of. An exploration would not be enough for me to support the mechanic. I had never played under the conditions to understand what they meant and those fine, fine details were highly important.<br />
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To me, it was strange that I was asked to sign it. That confusion derives from my avoidance of group think. If the entire CSM supported the idea the idea would gain more weight. Somehow in the world of social engineering. Hence, it made sense to get the CSM to sign. Most did. Ten of the fourteen of us signed. Some that did not deal with that area of game play as a major focus but they had prior or secondary experience.<br />
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The document was released to the public and it was followed by an explosion of negativity. Those that did not care for the documents authors pulled soapboxes from obscure corners and demonetized them to anyone that would hear. I found myself sucked up into the vortex for the simple reason that I had not signed.<br />
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"Why didn't you sign the Deal?" I was asked. Others praised me for seeing through the manipulative efforts. Ever the lover of truth I took a moment to write why I didn't sign the Deal in a weekly update. "I don't know enough about the topic to sign off on any want or change," I said. "Therefore, I did not sign because I felt I'd be signing in ignorance."<br />
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The truth set nothing free. A lot of people ignored me. It was one of my first tastes of having others interpret my words or actions for me. Sometimes against what I said my words or actions were. It was not something that I cared about. Yet, it was not something I knew how to correct or stop. Somehow there was the actual, tangible me that anyone could come and talk to and the phantom me that people created and seemed to like better. That me was more sensational then the boring me that answered things honestly and had a general neutral tone to things.<br />
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Several CSM members had asked CCP if they wanted a master document signed off by the leaders of null sec. They were told yes. But, when the Deal was released and the backlash about the signatures hit, that part never seemed to come up. Instead the authors and signatories were assumed to be making an effort to manipulate CCP. It was a strange situation to watch. There was an abundance of anger.<br />
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I just wanted people to pay attention to the minutes, which were becoming a masterpiece by my pure, raw obsession.<br />
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One of teh true and tangable duties that a member of the CSM had was to produce the minutes. The minutes were a summary of our talks. The CSM playerbase looked to them with anticipation. The invested playerbase also looked to them but more as a source of future design paths and juicy news.<br />
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The previous CSM had created a poor reputation with the release of their minutes. That came from a few sources. They had problems with approval for what they wrote. They also just didn't get around to writing them. That reputation passed on and there was an edge of competition to release the minutes fast. Our loud media member made grandiose promises about the minutes and it became a running joke in some circles to ask him when they would be released.<br />
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With full control of the process I decided that more was better. People wanted to know what was said. They wanted to see how their elected people presented themselves. There was a bit of viciousness in my goal. I was frustrated with people who pretended to be passionate and active CSM members but in reality looked in perhaps once a week. I had watched half of the group pay no attention at the meetings. I watched one of the permanent reps, elected with the most votes to earn that seat spend the last two days of the summit shopping for Magic the Gathering cards instead of pay any attention to the sessions. I wanted the minutes as detailed as possible because it would be a clear indication of how active people actually were for those that chose to look.<br />
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I started with the first session. That was my own. I opened it and pulled up the video and discovered a new and horrid discomfort. I had to not only listen to my voice but watch myself on video. Video that was an unflattering fish eye lense. It was awful and I learned to position the window so that I did not see any of the video.<br />
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I also discovered that I had a nervous laugh. Hour after hour I listened to myself end statements with a nervous laugh. It was embarrassing and I vowed to correct that verbal tic immediately. I knew that I had been nervous but I could see and hear my nervousness. Unpleasant stuff and I not only had to listen I had to relisted as I typed what was said.<br />
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What was produced was a transcript. Word for word as true as I could. I was exhaustive and it also set a standard. That first day I spent four hours writing out one session. The second day I spent another four. Day after day I wrote sessions until I had written out seven sessions across nine days. Our liaison had given us two weeks to get the minutes written.<br />
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At the seventh session my energy gave out. There were twenty six sessions to write. It should have given us each two sessions. Some wrote nothing. Others wrote two or three. As we neared the final weekend, we still had four undone sessions. Four and little interest in getting them done. I picked up another two sessions. Corbexx picked up a fourth and he was almost done when the two incumbents swooped in and snatched up the two last sessions and submitted them.<br />
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Their work was subpar to what everyone else had released. But, I cared little at that point. I felt a mental pain from the listening and transcribing. Peace and quiet and a day or two off of typing were all I asked for.<br />
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My nine sessions would become part of the root of a reputation as a worker. It was a reptuation I did not mind having. Between the miutes and my book of questions, I started to feel comfortable in my position. It had taken almost five months but I had finally settled in. I would also be told that my transcripts were to honest.<br />
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Honesty is fascinating. People say that they want it but when it happens the suggestions are to do away with it. My transcripts showed personalites and not everyone took to them very well. It was suggested to me by a previous CSM member that I was too honest in how I portrayed developers. That it might damage my relationship with them due to the way in which I blogged about my interactions on the CSM.<br />
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My first reaction was anger. Intense anger. I did not exaggerate. I laid out what was there. That someone would be mad at me for portraying what they had been in a true fashion baffled me. Later, I'd figure it out. That the opinion was that honesty was to be tempered to spare feelings and make sure someone was not cast in a negative light. My decision defied conventional wisdom. But, I had declared my intent to share as much as I could. If someone was upset that I had shared them in their true state, I was not going to be guilty.<br />
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Things could not sail along in sweet and productive bliss. As the writing of the summit minutes wound down our next problem wound up. One of our members was going to have to resign.<br />
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We were going to be known as the CSM that lost the most people. We'd not actually be that CSM. The other ones had simply been able to cover up their inactive membership. Ours were asked to step down because we were pushing an idea of transparent and productivity. The first person had been purely inactive. In previous years that would have been left to their own devices. The second however was much more complex.<br />
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The standard that the CSM is held to is the same standard as any other player. We must obey the rules of the game. We do not hold a greater moral obligation. However, when someone breaks a game rule, it won't be overlooked. Such was what happened when one of our members update his corporation and they decided to remove him.<br />
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There is no account sharing in Eve. If you wish to leave you can give your character to someone else. You initiate a transfer from your account to theirs. They then own the character. In actual practice people would just give their friends access to their accounts. Those accounts were often given back if the players returned. Until then, the account was managed and shared with another player. The only problem was that account sharing was illegal. It was clearly illegal yet CCP turned a blind eye. That is, until someone complained.<br />
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As the story was told to me, an expensive ship was sold. The income from that ship was used. When the player returned they were offered to be reimbursed for the sale. They instead wanted the current market value that was higher. Tempers flared and a complaint was filed.<br />
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What I was told off the record was that this happened because the player would not break his NDA with his corporation and alliance leaders and he was forced out so that they could get someone in that would.<br />
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The back room dealings of the CSM were well known to everyone but me it seemed. There were many nudges and hints about this. I would tell people that I had no deals because I did not. I was pet on the head. My reputation for honesty made them treat me like an innocent. "Everyone else is," they told me. "You cannot believe that your fellow CSM members are not leaking to their alliances."<br />
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I did. Simply because there was knowledge we possessed that groups were not acting on. However, the wider belief was that we leaked information. I had one of my corpmates send me a message one day and ask me, "What use are you? We don't get anything useful. This group over here knows everything that is going on. You are worthless." I brought this up to my friend. He told me to ignore them. He did mention that he'd received similar complaints since he had brought me into the corporation and he had told those people to get lost.<br />
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Was that good or bad? Did people assume I leaked or did they think I did not? The answer was probably both but more believed I held my knowledge. After all, I did write capacious amounts of information about what I thought and the interactions I could share. I was one of the most open CSM members that they had ever had. That reputation protected me from some assumptions. But they did not protect him.<br />
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When our liaison told us that one of our members had been given the chance to step down before he was removed due to breaking the end user licensing agreement, it was a bit of a shock. A second person, only a few months after the first? Who would replace him? How would they rerun things? I don't think anyone disagreed. A rule had been broken and rules should be enforced. But oh how I wished that it hadn't been that way. CSM9 was breaking all the rules it seemed. We were useless, broken, and incapable. End the CSM, get rid of them. The posts appeared on the official forums, as I expected. The assumptions were made, rumors ran rampant and I really just wished that we could discuss the minutes and the future of the game.<br />
<br />Sugar Kylehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15437978687639772023noreply@blogger.com5